Canned Food

At Lunch...

Ted: "Has anyone tried that chili that I've been seeing advertisements for lately?   ... ... Tom?"
Tom: "I don't eat canned food."
Ted: "F--- you b----."
(silence)

(later, Stew arrives at our table)
Me: "Hi Stew.  Don't tell Ted that you don't eat canned food."
Stew: "I don't know if I want to know why."
Tom: "I said it and my ears will never be the same."
Ted (angry): "Wait until I box your ears...then see how they feel."


...